Disclaimer for babies who don't understand satire
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This weblog is satire. Just in case you didn't notice. We purposefully do not make any reference to "god" "christianity" or "creators" because we are actually not interested in offending peoples' belifes.
Any reference from others linking our site to a parody of christianity is not our responsiblity, but we will delete offensive posts.We do not seek to make fun of or discriminate ANY religion. We do not want to offend any religious, spiritual, caring people out there, what we are making fun of is the fact that people will belive anything, if it's on the web. We do not take any money, or possesions off of people. We are just making a joke. Ok? Up yours.
This also includes the random people i choose to pick on on thier blogs and say that they suck for no reason. You don't really suck, in fact your lucky you have been chosen to convert. C'mon guys, stop with the whole, "Morri's gonna die stuff". Sheesh!
On that point, if you see Grandmaster Morri in the street, he's just the poster boy and founder, I am the one who does this blog so , if you want to punch someone , punch me not him.
Old Man Morri
Any reference from others linking our site to a parody of christianity is not our responsiblity, but we will delete offensive posts.We do not seek to make fun of or discriminate ANY religion. We do not want to offend any religious, spiritual, caring people out there, what we are making fun of is the fact that people will belive anything, if it's on the web. We do not take any money, or possesions off of people. We are just making a joke. Ok? Up yours.
This also includes the random people i choose to pick on on thier blogs and say that they suck for no reason. You don't really suck, in fact your lucky you have been chosen to convert. C'mon guys, stop with the whole, "Morri's gonna die stuff". Sheesh!
On that point, if you see Grandmaster Morri in the street, he's just the poster boy and founder, I am the one who does this blog so , if you want to punch someone , punch me not him.
Old Man Morri
i believe in the morri.
i literally love being a morrist
Master Morri, recently i have become more interested in people, have gotten out of the house and am eating well and starting to enjoy life...
What's wrong with me,
Concerned,
Jeff.
Jeff, eating well and being "happy" is not what Morrism is about. I suggest that you realise you are worthless and simply give up and / or stop trying altogether. We will provide you with all the knowlege you need so that you don't have to think for your self anymore. Try sticking your fingers up at people till tuesday and that should curb any cravings of wanting to be around people.
Your finger guidance is working for me right now, oh great one.
Good, it is designed to do so. We are so wise we knew you would feel that way, and now there are more pics in the grey bar named Morrist photos for your shrine.
Sincerly,
Up yours.
Old man morri.
Recntly my wife of 7 years left me and took the house and the kids. I have no money and feel utterly hopless and stupid all the time.
what should i do..?
james
Well unfortunatly having no money , house and kids, you will have nothing to donate to us...
The only real upside is that you feel totally dejected, and there fore make a prime candidate for our cult.
what you should do of course is join us, and stop thinking and "feeling" for yourself.
ok? Up yours.
Morri.
You're so wise I could almost be sick with appreciation, then donate it to you as an offering.
Trust me, nothing says "i belive in you Morri" like vomit. We also accept, blood, sweat and/or visa card.
Morri.
Do you accept blood and sweat crusted credit cards? I want to pile donations of faith upon you to fill my aching personal void.
I went to a scientology office in Perth because I was jobless at the time. They advertised in the employment section of the local paper.
They told me I would have to work for them exclusively for 2 years without pay.
I suggested that they should not have advertised in the employment section as they were not paying, so it wasn't technically a job.
They said it was because it involved a contract.
I left quickly.
Now I hate Cruise too...
Well since were are strictly, (and this might seem strange) opposed to mocking any specific religion or persuation in here, i cannot formaly make fun of scientology, because as you know they will sue. However, i can and will make fun of perth, because they suck, and no-one likes them anyway.
Therefore as you will see your beef must be with perth, and contracts, as it is our firm belife you should not have to work and/or study.Your sole purpose in "life" is to be linked to us. As for blood infused credit cards, well when Morri himself travelled through Bali back from the U.K he had to wash all his credit cards in blood and sweat, to remove traces of Cocaine. ( this recipe will also remove grass and /or other stimulants)
I hope this settles any spiritual ambiguity for your self, and generally helps with the travelling.
up yours
I think the tie is, for want of a more apt phrase currently bouncing within my rubber walls, fucked. It should be thinner by about three inches. I don't know what that is in metric terms because I've only ever written to US Playboy.
Tell me, does being a 'Morrist' involve dancing with ribbons and bells? If not, I ain't budging.
"Thanks Andy on the grammar error. I dig yo style!!"
Morrism, my dear virtual friend is whatever you want it to be.
REPENT!
you can't touch this...
Sold! If there's touching involved I'm definitely in. Repenting as I type. It ain't easy, but you live and you learn.
Oh, and it's your style, not yo style. What the fuck, man!
;)
BTW, are you writing at Five Word Stories yet? Haven't seen yo name.
You should have editing rights...
...
...
...Now.
Why do you all do this? What is this fascination with this "cult"? Why put so much time and effort into conjuring something that has no benefit nor entertaining effect? I sense a lack of direction, anger, and frustration.
I hope you find your way and learn to forgive those who you feel have wronged you- whether it be yourself, others, or God.
Peace be with you.